http://www.theferalscribe.com/featured/tempin-aint-easy-dealing-with-queen-bees.html Chronicles of a Wayfaring Journalist Mon, 30 Apr 2012 00:17:27 +0000 hourly 1 http://www.theferalscribe.com/featured/tempin-aint-easy-dealing-with-queen-bees.html/comment-page-1#comment-235 WonderfulwomanK Sat, 23 Apr 2011 17:23:11 +0000 http://www.theferalscribe.com/?p=3819#comment-235 Nathan, women in the work place are subjected to these same self-entitled narcissists as men. The bad guys (Queen Bees) come in BOTH sexes.  I have lived your story over and over again with numerous bosses--male and female--when I worked in KY state government. Some were so bad I can safely label them abusive.  Some were so abusive that our victimization became remarkably famous--even beyond our department. Those who think bullying and psychological trauma do not occur in the workplace may be surprised to find out it is prevalent and can do enormous harm. (The American Psychological Association dedicated an issue of their Monitor magazine to office bullying.) I had over 100 bosses in my lifetime. Sadly, there were more bad, self-centered ones than good ones. I also was a boss, albeit a reluctant one. Self-centered people lacking empathy relish the power they have.  It is astounding to me how much (unfounded) entitlement they believe they have compared to others.  When they abuse power, they range from insidious oppressive, mean-spirited bullies to flat out frightening perpetrators. They do it because they can. Nobody is serving to temper their attitudes, and thus their behaviors.  At least a college professor is evaluated by students, and that process is taken seriously.  People down the chain of command from bosses are seldom, if ever, given the opportunity to evaluate supervisors. The only time we were given such an opportunity in state government, the boss I had at that time retaliated severely against me. Motives get distorted. Primary goal of the narcissistic supervisor becomes to serve the self.  Somehow the job to be done gets lost in the shuffle. These dynamics will be all too familiar ones to your readers; they translate across systems.  For instance, look at the Teabaggers in the U.S. House of Representatives.  It's all about them.  They forget the job of the government is to serve ALL its people. (BTW the US goverment IS the people--not a we and them situation.) Putting others first? taking others' points of view? Foreign, if not frightening concepts to the narcissist. At cross-purposes with their motives.Vicki Nathan, women in the work place are subjected to these same self-entitled narcissists as men. The bad guys (Queen Bees) come in BOTH sexes.  I have lived your story over and over again with numerous bosses–male and female–when I worked in KY state government. Some were so bad I can safely label them abusive.  Some were so abusive that our victimization became remarkably famous–even beyond our department. Those who think bullying and psychological trauma do not occur in the workplace may be surprised to find out it is prevalent and can do enormous harm. (The American Psychological Association dedicated an issue of their Monitor magazine to office bullying.) I had over 100 bosses in my lifetime. Sadly, there were more bad, self-centered ones than good ones. I also was a boss, albeit a reluctant one. Self-centered people lacking empathy relish the power they have.  It is astounding to me how much (unfounded) entitlement they believe they have compared to others.  When they abuse power, they range from insidious oppressive, mean-spirited bullies to flat out frightening perpetrators. They do it because they can. Nobody is serving to temper their attitudes, and thus their behaviors.  At least a college professor is evaluated by students, and that process is taken seriously.  People down the chain of command from bosses are seldom, if ever, given the opportunity to evaluate supervisors. The only time we were given such an opportunity in state government, the boss I had at that time retaliated severely against me. Motives get distorted. Primary goal of the narcissistic supervisor becomes to serve the self.  Somehow the job to be done gets lost in the shuffle. These dynamics will be all too familiar ones to your readers; they translate across systems.  For instance, look at the Teabaggers in the U.S. House of Representatives.  It’s all about them.  They forget the job of the government is to serve ALL its people. (BTW the US goverment IS the people–not a we and them situation.) Putting others first? taking others’ points of view? Foreign, if not frightening concepts to the narcissist. At cross-purposes with their motives.Vicki

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